Reaper's Girl (Rockin' Country #5) Page 8

  “That’s it though. My biggest fear, man,” Garrett confessed. “She’ll just keep saying yes at the expense of herself, us, and anyone else who needs her to say yes. What happens if she goes back to what she was doing before, what happens if I can’t save her?”

  “That’s a conversation you and she need to have together. I know this because Shell and I have the same conversation at least once every three months or so. It’s frustrating for me, but I understand where she’s coming from because I know how I am. I don’t realize I’m off the rails until I’m completely off, and the only hope of getting me back is putting my ass in rehab again. I don’t want to be there, and I know Hannah doesn’t either.”

  Jared watched as Garrett struggled. He didn’t know what his friend struggled with, but he wanted to be patient enough to let Garrett work this out on his own. He didn’t know what it was like to love someone with an addiction, only knew what it was like to be the person with the addiction. While Hannah had successfully had control over hers for a long time, Jared knew the touring cycle, the scrutiny of the public eye, and the insane amount of pressure she would be under would make it easy for her to slip back into old habits. It was the easiest thing to do when things became too hard or too stressful.

  “You have to talk to her; you have to voice your fears to her. She has insecurities like we all do, and chances are she’s already thinking what you are.”

  “My fear…” Garrett’s voice was strangled with emotion. It was a tone he didn’t readily let people hear, but all his barriers were down with his best friend. “My fear is she’ll clam up, tell me I’m dumb, and feel like I’m throwing accusations at her. I’m not and I never would unless I thought something was truly going on. I just want her to know I’m here for her if things start to be too much.”

  “That’s all you gotta tell her, man. Just be upfront, honest, and loving. That’s all we want, and I’m telling you that’s all she needs. Hannah’s smart and she’s been where she is right now before. She’ll know what she needs from you. Will she ask for it? That’s a different question altogether. So why don’t you take the question out of it and just let her know you’re there no matter what.”

  Garrett glanced over at his son, the other most important person in his life. “I will. If it makes her mad, then so be it. I’ll take her anger any day. But if it saves her hurt, I’ll be glad I did.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  * * *

  Garrett was nervous. After his lunch with Jared, he’d come to the conclusion he needed to talk to Hannah. He needed to see where her head was and make sure there weren’t any thoughts hanging around that could be detrimental to her and her ongoing recovery. A conversation like this hadn’t happened in over a year—not since she’d lost the baby weight from EJ’s pregnancy.

  She’d gone to tuck EJ in, and then they had the night to themselves. He’d gotten her a glass of wine and turned the lights down low in the living room. He hoped she would be relaxed and not feel as if he were accusing her of something. That was his biggest fear. He didn’t want her to think he didn’t trust her.

  “He’s down,” she said as she came into the living room. “Havock stayed up there with him like normal.” She laughed softly as she had a seat next to him on their huge couch.

  She leaned her head back against the couch and breathed a deep sigh. “I’m tired. Today was a long day.”

  “Did you finally get the stylist to listen to what you want to wear?” He tried to keep the irritation out of his voice, but it was hard to temper his response.

  “Is that why you left?” She glanced over at him.

  “I hate when people don’t take you or what you say seriously. You know it pisses me off. I hate when they constantly deflect to Shell.”

  She shrugged. “It’s how it’s always been. You heard me though; I told her what I wanted, and we had no problems after that. It was a good day,” she admitted. “Just tiring. I forgot how much energy all of the things that encompass a tour take.”

  He was quiet, biting his tongue. He wanted to lay everything out for her but was scared to. It was unlike him to hold back with her, but bringing it up right now felt like he was forcing her hand, much like all those other people did.

  “I can tell you want to ask me something, Garrett. Why don’t you do it?”

  He turned so they were facing one another. It struck him how young she looked right now. No makeup, hair up off her face, wearing one of his T-shirts and a pair of yoga pants. She still looked like a teenager, not the woman who turned him inside out, not the mother of his child, and maybe that was the problem. He’d always want to protect her, because it always seemed like she needed it.

  “How are you doing? Do you feel like the pressure is getting to you?”

  She leaned over, cupping his face with her hands. “I love you.” She leaned into him, kissing him on the lips.

  “I love you too, but I seriously want an answer, Han.”

  “I’m fine, I promise you.” She grabbed his hand. “If I feel like things are about to go out of control, I’ll tell you. I have no desire to go back down the road I’ve already been on. I’m truly in a good place right now, Garrett.”

  He blew out a deep breath. “Okay, I’ll trust you and believe you unless it seems like I can’t anymore.”

  “I know my past and I know where I came from. I know it’s hard for you to believe I will be honest with you, because you’re used to dealing with Jared, and I’m not going to get angry with you. It’d be easy for me to, because the old me would be offended that you’re even asking me this question. This me now knows you do it because you’re worried and you love me. I will tell you and ask for help if I need it. I have more than myself to think about now, and I would never ever put our family at risk.”

  He felt the anxiety release in his chest, felt his breath come easier. Reaching for her, he pulled her into his body, holding her tight. “Things are going to get insane if the internet is any indication. Fans have been waiting on you to come back for a long time. They’re foaming at the mouth over your little twenty-second clip. It might pull us apart more than we like.”

  She grasped his hand, entwining their fingers together. Lifting them up, her voice was strong. “But nobody’s gonna break up what’s stronger when it’s wrapped together, and I am totally wrapped up in you. You hold me up, I’ll hold you up?”

  “No need to even ask, babe.” He kissed her forehead. “I got you.”

  * * *

  “When are they loading it?” Hannah asked Shell as they sat at the dining room table.

  Friends and family had gathered for a cookout. The first week of November was unseasonably warm in the Nashville area, so they were taking advantage. The celebration was including the premiere of Harmony’s new video too.

  “All the sponsored posts are set to load at two p.m.” Shell checked the clock. “So it should go live here in a second.” She saw the clock turn to 1:55.

  “Who all chose to sponsor?”

  Hannah hadn’t thought to ask those questions when the record company had come to her and told her they were allowing other artists to share her video release. She’d been so touched she hadn’t even thought to ask numbers.

  “Between country, pop, and some rock,” she quickly checked her sheet, “we have a total of twenty.”

  “Which is fucking unheard of,” Jared griped as he sat across from her at the table. “I wanna be you when I grow up, with all that friendly support.”

  She threw a piece of paper at him. “Shut up. I’ve been gone a long time. I’m surprised one person even wanted to do it, even though I should have a gimme with you guys.”

  Stacey, who’d come in with the family, sat down next to her. “I’m scheduling their social media now, because they can’t seem to trust other people and Shell wanted nothing to do with it.”

  Hannah threw Shell a look. “I have enough on my plate with you.”

  “I can say wholeheartedly you’re the first and only p
ost today for Black Friday.” Stacey gave her a grin.

  Hannah felt the love in the room. Her parents and Garrett’s parents were outside playing with EJ. Stacey and Brad had made the trip out. Chris hadn’t been able to, but he’d sent her flowers earlier in the day telling her how sorry he was. He was still working on bettering himself with school, and she couldn’t fault him for that.

  Brad had a seat next to Stacey at the table and scooted closer to her. “I have to say, I’m pretty damn excited to see the video myself. I was always kind of into your music before you even became a part of the family. I’m a fan here.” He slung his arm around Stacey’s neck.

  Glancing around the room, Hannah saw Garrett wasn’t in the vicinity. He’d been shooting glares at the couple all afternoon. It’d been enough to send her into a fit of giggles earlier. Big brother was not excited at all that Brad and Stacey were still together, but he’d been told to leave them alone by everyone.

  “Okay, okay.” Shell beat the table with her fist. “I just got the message. It’s loaded. Get everybody in here!”

  Would it be okay if she crawled under the table? Maybe watched it on her own in the other room? Hannah wondered as people started crowding into the dining room. This was one of the most embarrassing situations she’d ever been in, and she wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was because the song hit so close to home, it was so personal, and even though they were public figures, she wasn’t used to putting their love on display.

  She knew the video was sexy; they’d made sure of that by having Garrett with her. You couldn’t see his face, but his tattoos were there, exposed by the short-sleeve shirt he wore. It was a straight-up love song, but not one that was slow; it was upbeat, with a pop edge to it. She’d written the song not long after the two of them had gotten together—if she could remember correctly it wasn’t long after their Vegas trip. Listening to the lyrics, she was taken back to those first few weeks and months where her thoughts had been consumed by him. She’d loved his green eyes, the sparks that flew when they were around each other, his dimples, and the reckless nature of their love. Everyone had told her she should run as fast as she could, but she’d known he’d pull her right back.

  One night they’d stood in the rain kissing, and the song had written itself in less than ten minutes when she’d gotten back to her hotel room. She’d never let anyone hear it until Kurt had pulled the frayed paper out of the back of her binder, and feeling the emotions swell as she watched the video, she was glad he had.

  As the video came to a close, the two of them in the middle of the pedestrian bridge in Nashville and water pouring down over top of them, their lips meeting in the sweetest kiss, she knew she’d made the best decision of her life.

  “It turned out good, huh?” Garrett put his arm around her neck, pulling her to him.

  She leaned her head back against his chest, letting him kiss her cheek. “Anything with us turns out good, but yeah, it did.”

  Over dinner, the group sat at the table discussing how much they loved the song, the video, and the fact Harmony Stewart was back. In the middle of the conversation, Shell’s phone dinged, and she grabbed it, glancing at the message.

  “Three hours in, Han, and you’re at three million views. Pre-orders for the album have started at iTunes, and you’re on three different charts there. The all-genre, the country, and the pop. It’s happening!”

  Hannah took a drink of her wine. It was definitely happening, and the train would keep going until it came to a natural stop.

  Chapter Eighteen

  * * *

  “Jared and I drove by last night. People were already lined up,” Shell commented as she and Hannah made their way through downtown traffic onto Lower Broad.

  “Last night?” Hannah questioned, a touch of amazement and awe in her voice. “So some of them have essentially been lined up for twenty-four hours?

  Shell gave her friend an excited look. “Yeah, they’re excited, Han.”

  “Oh God.” Hannah could feel the nerves start to bubble in her stomach, but there was also a huge amount of excitement. “I can’t believe how fast this shaped up.” She grabbed her phone out of her purse, took a selfie, and posted it to her Instagram.

  Ready for my show at the world famous @Tootsies! Hope to see as many as we can pack in there! #nervous #readytobeback #thankyouforwaiting #myhothusbandwillbethere #reapersgirl

  She was still a little amazed things were happening so quickly. Three days ago the record company had approached her with the idea for a free show. She’d been quick to agree because she’d seen the good things free shows had done for Black Friday. Within a day they’d secured the venue, and then they’d leaked it to radio stations. Hannah had posted a teaser on Instagram, and news of her comeback had started to spread. Now fans had been lined up for over twenty-four hours.

  “Things happen fast. You know that as well as I do, but it seems like it’s warp speed this time, right?” Shell jockeyed for a spot behind the venue. There were only a few parking spots left, and they were reserved for Hannah and her family members.

  “You can say that again.” She breathed deeply as she sat in the passenger seat. At home she’d gotten ready because she’d been too afraid to do so at the venue. All she had to do was change her clothes closer to stage time. “I’m really excited though. They let me pick my set list, so I’m doing all kinds of songs I haven’t done in years. All my favorites from every album.”

  Shell grabbed her bag out of the back. “It’s going to be weird hearing you sing songs that were written back when you were eighteen, and I haven’t heard you sing in so long.”

  “Are you kidding? At rehearsal yesterday, I had to pull the lyrics up on my phone for a few,” Hannah laughed. “I have to be honest with you. This feels good, but I’m scared too. I’ve been gone a long time. A lot of those insecurities are creeping up.”

  “You’re gonna fill this place and tear the roof off of it. Next week your album drops, and then off you go.”

  Back when she’d told Garrett she’d wanted to go into the studio, she hadn’t thought it would be this easy. Not that it’d totally been easy, but it’d been easier than she imagined. With the help of Garrett, friends, and family they’d made it through this process almost unscathed as a family. The rest should be easy, she told herself. But she wasn’t so sure.

  * * *

  “You’re sure you don’t mind keeping him tonight?” Garrett asked his mother- and father-in-law as he packed up EJ’s bag. They would all be riding to the show and supporting Hannah together, but afterwards they planned on going out and being adults for the first time in a long time.

  “We don’t mind, and you know he loves sleeping over at the house.” Robert grabbed his grandson up, holding him while Garrett finished doing stuff around the house and giving Havock some extra food.

  “Can you make sure I put his ear pieces in there?” Garrett grabbed his wallet and car keys. “Hannah will kill me if he can’t watch the show because I didn’t bring ear protection.”

  “Got ’em.” His mother-in-law held them so he could see.

  “Alright, then we’re good to go. You ready to go see Mama?” He grabbed EJ up in his arms, and they all made their way out of the house. They were trying to figure out seating arrangements in cars when his parents and the rest of the band showed up.

  Garrett loved how excited everyone was; he’d even put on a Harmony Stewart shirt like he’d worn back in the day, but this one was a little bigger than before. If he was going to wear it all night, he needed to make sure it wouldn’t cut off his circulation. EJ wore one too, and all his bandmates out in California had taken a picture wearing one, showing their support earlier in the day. When they’d posted it to their Instagram account, he’d almost cried from laughing. It was one thing for him to show his support wearing a ridiculous shirt, but for them to do it—well, it said a lot about his friends. This show was important to her, and with it being on Lower Broad in downtown, where all the industry people wer
e and the most die-hard of her fans, he wanted to show his support. He hoped she got a little laugh out of it too.

  “We need to get going,” he tried to rally everyone up. If he didn’t they’d still be there well after Hannah went on, trying to figure out who was riding where.

  “I’ll make this easy.” Jared raised a hand. “My wife drove his wife, so we need to ride together. We’ll get the kid, and the rest of you can follow in two vehicles. We can get everybody back home, but we need to make sure the grandparents can take EJ home. Done?” He clapped his hands. “Done. Let’s go!”

  As the three guys got into Garrett’s Range Rover, he looked over at his friend. “Thank you for taking control of that mess out there. Han would be so fucking heartbroken if we were late, and I could see it happening.”

  “Not a problem. Sometimes it helps not to be related to anyone.”

  Garrett had to agree with that one hundred percent. “Alright, everybody smile.” Jared leaned in, and Garrett made sure to get EJ in the back in his car seat as he took the selfie. He’d seen earlier where Hannah had taken one, and he wanted to do the same for her.

  On our way to see Reaper’s Girl @harmonystewart perform tonight. If you’re in Nashvegas and you’re able to come to the show, be sure and do it. She practiced yesterday and I have to say, it was magic seeing my wife on stage again. #luckyman #groupie #marriedandhappy

  “Your hashtags are killing me.” Jared laughed as he glanced at the app on his phone.

  “Ha! The married and happy is a stab at a website that posted this God-awful picture of me. I’m pretty sure it was after we did Crossfit, and they talked about how unhappy I looked. Well yeah, duh. I’d just puked my guts out, and they were saying there was trouble in paradise.”