Havoc Read online

  I reach down, pushing his shorts and boxers off his hip bones. He groans when I take hold of his hard cock in between my hands. “Leigh.” He buries his face in my neck, the rasp of his short beard scoring my flesh. It’s the hottest thing I’ve ever felt in my life.

  “Don’t stop me, Havoc,” I breathe into his ear, grabbing the lobe and pulling at the earring. “I want this, want you, need to feel you inside me.”

  “Here?” He questions, his fingers denting my flesh with their rough grip.

  “Here,” I confirm. “We’ve gotten a taste of each other, and I’m sick of the taste. I want the whole fuckin’ sundae, not just the whipped cream topping.”

  He pulls back, grinning at me, before he moves his hands down, gripping the edges of my t-shirt before pulling it off my body. Again, I pitch backward as he presses against me until my back hits the wall of the garage.

  “Sure you don’t wanna go inside? Get a comfortable bed and let me lay you down.” He smears his lips against my neck. “Let me ravage you.”

  “You can ravage me just as well here.” I reach down, pulling the cup of my bra down, exposing my flesh to his gaze. “Please ravage me, show me what I’ve been dreaming about isn’t a dream.

  He leans down, capturing my nipple in his mouth, tugging on the tight flesh before he swirls it with his tongue, soothing the pinch. My arms tighten around his neck, holding him closer, arching up to his mouth, wanting his touch.

  “God you feel so good,” I moan, spreading my legs wider, giving him more room. I can feel his hard cock, pressing against my core, but I still have clothes on and it’s frustrating me.

  “Need to get these leggings off,” he growls as I push up into his hard length.

  Trying to get them off while I’m pressed against the wall proves impossible. It’s then that I hear a growl and then hear a rip, I look down, seeing the hottest thing ever. He literally ripped the clothes from my body. “Jesus,” I gasp for air, before he covers my mouth with his again.

  Anchoring my thighs to the wall with his hips, I feel his fingers run through my core and both of us moan at the moisture there.

  “Always so goddamned wet for me.” He smears it up and down his cock, which right now is the second hottest thing he’s ever done, and then moves my panties as he shoves home.

  I realize quickly that sex with Holden isn’t hearts and flowers. It’s ripped clothes, slick skin, grunting, groaning, and slapping flesh. It’s amazing.

  My legs tighten around his waist, my feet dig into his ass, and I try to push my back against the wall to give me purchase as he slides in and out of my body. Pushing up, pulling out; it’s a dance we’ll perfect if there’s anything I have to say about it.

  Closing my eyes, I let my head fall back against the wall, let my shoulders take the weight, and then I feel his lips on my neck. His teeth nip at the tendons before his tongue soothes the bite and then his mouth sucks harshly against the flesh. I’ll wear the badges of this coupling for weeks, I’m positive, but I’ll wear them with pride.

  “Yes,” he grunts as he pushes deeper into my body, hitching my legs higher, bottoming out, and rubbing against my nipples in the best of ways. Every single part of my body is turned on, on fire, and ready for what he’s doing to me.

  When he picks up the pace and reaches down to put a thumb at my clit, I’m done for. There’s not much more I can take. I force my eyes open and watch as his thrusts become less calculated, more frenzied, and he closes his eyes, pushing his head back on his shoulders. The strong tendons of his neck pop out as he strains for the finish. I lean in, grabbing hold of his earlobe between my teeth, something I learned in one of our make out sessions that he loves.

  “Fuck yeah, Leigh, what do you need?” he pants, his body going rigid, harder as he thrusts into me and we work toward the end together.

  “Hard, faster,” I pant. And he gives me everything I want. The only sounds in the garage are that of fucking. The slapping of flesh, the moans, the groans, the sounds he makes as he withdraws and then pushes back in, my sharp intake of breath when he hits all the way so that he pushes against the finger on my clit.

  “Can’t hold back much longer,” Holden moans.

  “Let it go, Havoc,” I groan. “I’m with you, take me with you.”

  Our bodies slap against each other, wanting the orgasm we each crave, that we’ve denied each other for so long. My flesh is swollen and needy, ready to take what he wants to give me. And give me he does.

  With one last guttural groan, he thrusts into my pussy and his body tightens, holds still as he comes, collapsing against me, his mouth open against my neck. His hot breath on my flesh and the feel of his jerking cock is all I need as I writhe against his thumb.

  “Fuck me,” he moans, slightly pushing in and pulling out as aftershocks wrack our bodies.

  We’re both quiet, trying to figure out what to say to each other. But when our gazes meet, I giggle. I can’t believe I just had sex with him outside, with the doors to the garage open where anyone can see.

  “I’ve never done it outside before,” I laugh, holding his body close to mine.

  “Me neither. Thank God we live out here, and no one could see you. If we lived close enough to have neighbors, I never would have chanced someone seeing you like this besides me,” he admits, kissing me softly. “Guess that’s one to scratch off the bucket list.”

  We’re quiet for a few minutes as we try to clean up and he helps me get my footing underneath me. Neither one of us seems to know what to say to one another, but I catch him looking at me. Looking at me with passion and desire, and it heats me back up again.

  “How would you feel about knocking something else off the bucket list?”

  He gives me the sexiest grin. “I say I’ll meet you inside, wife of mine, and we’ll see what we can do.”

  I giggle as I run into the house. Finally, I’m getting to the best parts of being married, and I’m hoping like hell he’s letting his guard down enough to let me in.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  Havoc

  It’s unusual for most of us to have the night off together, but the scheduling gods have shined down and the five of us sit at a table, each nursing our own beers. Laurel Springs has one bar, Hooligan’s, and I think all of us, except for Mason who didn’t grow up here, have been kicked out once for underage drinking. It’s nice to be back and not have to worry.

  “How’s Caleb? Had a chance to talk to the teacher?” It’s important for me to know what’s going on in my guys’ lives, what could distract them from the job at hand. It’s a dangerous one, and knowing what they’re going through helps me, and talking about it can help them too.

  “He’s good,” he chuckles. “I haven’t heard much about the teacher, and I have a conference scheduled with her. There’s one thing I do know, though he’s half in love with your wife.”

  I take a long drink off my bottle, grinning over the top at him. “I know.”

  “Does she?”

  “Oh hell no, she has no idea,” I laugh along with him. “It’s good though, if she did, she’d probably make it awkward. You know how it is to be a teenage boy in love with an older woman, don’t you, Renegade,” I tease the youngest member of our team.

  He answers with a middle finger pointed in my direction. “I also know what it’s like to be the man she loves in return. If I were you, boss man, I’d watch myself,” he teases me right back.

  Taking another drink off my beer, I smirk. “I ain’t worried.”

  “What’s the deal with you two anyway?” Tank interjects in our conversation. “Sometimes looking at the two of you, like the other night, and I think you two are madly in love. But then I know how it started, we all do. What’s going on?”

  I swallow roughly, because I don’t know what to say to him. “It is real, but life has a way of making what should be the simplest of emotions and situations…complicated.”

  Maybe that’s the easiest way to put it. She’s the most important
person in my life, and I feel things for her I never thought I’d feel for another woman. But it’s a vulnerability I can’t allow myself, not after the young kid with the huge heart had it broken by a girl who couldn’t deal. I take another drink, draining the amber bottle I’m drinking from, and realize it was a girl who broke my heart, not a woman. Maybe I had been wrong to expect her to deal. Hell, sometimes I can’t even deal with the nightmares I have, the flashbacks I get at the weirdest times. I’m lucky I came back a whole man physically, and mostly a whole man mentally. It’s time I realized that.

  “Well uncomplicate things.” Tank throws a glare in my direction. “You’re lookin’ at the fuckin’ poster boy for getting off your ass and making sure the person you love knows how you feel. Don’t end up in a situation like Blaze and I did, man. I’m telling you, it’s not worth it.”

  “Nobody said anything about love.” I shake my head at him, gazing at him over my own bottle.

  “Nut the fuck up, dude. It’s not that hard.”

  Easy for Tank to say. He had a life or death situation to spur him on. It was either he had to figure it out, or they were going to lose everything they had. My situation, though, differs so much from his, and it’s hard to explain. She wears my ring, and I don’t think I’m ever going to let her go. I enjoy our life together too much.

  And the realization floors me. Grabbing my beer, I take another drink.

  Tank glances at me. “Love is love, and you can try to cut it every other way, but it is what it is. But it’s not fair for you to keep her now if you aren’t going to keep her later.”

  “I’m protecting her,” I argue.

  Every man sitting around the table laughs at me.

  “Yeah okay.” Ace claps me on the shoulder. “You keep telling yourself that, and maybe you’ll believe it.”

  I stretch my leg out when my phone starts vibrating so that I’m able to reach down into my pocket to retrieve it. Pulling it out, I see Leighton’s smiling picture and name flashing.

  “Guy’s this is Leigh, I gotta take it.” I’m already up and walking toward the entrance.

  I don’t miss Renegade talking shit as I get up. “He doesn’t love her, but she’s got a nickname and he makes it a point to take her call on guy’s night.”

  I flip him a finger and continue out to where it’s quiet enough so that I’m able to hear her. I never told them I don’t love her, but that’s my business to keep. She needs to be told before I tell them.

  Leighton

  “Have a good night, Caleb, and if you need anything call me. I know your dad’s out tonight.”

  He smiles over at me, looking too much like a grown man. “Leighton, I’ve been staying by myself in one way or another since I was twelve. I think I got this.”

  “Still,” I give him a look, “if you need anything, I’m around.”

  “If you need anything I’m around,” he argues, making me laugh.

  I wave and watch for him to get into his house before I pull away, heading toward my own. Truth be told, I hate driving late at night. Astigmatism makes it hard for me to see and reminds me of having grandmother eyes, no matter how young I am. Typically, I try to be home before it gets too late, but tonight Holden’s out with the guys and we had a party at The Café for one of Whitney’s clients. Cleaning up took longer than we thought, and here it is, after ten pm and I’m just now headed home.

  Slowly, I make my way along the back roads, creeping along because it doesn’t matter if it’s deer season or not, they like to run across the road. And the one who runs right in front of me proves my thought as I throw on my brakes to miss it, while jerking the car to the left. When I do, I feel my passenger tire blow.

  “Shit.”

  When the car stops, I’m shaking because I don’t have much experience with things like this. I’m not sure what to do, although I know I can’t change the tire myself. Nobody ever taught me how.

  Getting out, I walk around, using my cell phone as a flashlight so I can see how bad it is. Maybe I can drive the twelve remaining miles home without too much trouble.

  As soon as I see the condition, I know without a doubt, I can’t. Immediately I’m scared. Out in the dark by myself, with no idea how to change a tire, and it being so late at night.

  “Think Leighton, what to do?”

  Glancing down at my hand, my wedding ring shines against the cell phone turned flashlight. This is what a husband is supposed to do, right? Part of me hates interrupting him on his night with the guys though, he has so few of those. The other part of me is just too scared about being out here in the dark by myself.

  Mind made up, I flip my phone over and dial my husband. There’s very little hope that he’ll pick up, so imagine my surprise when he answers on the third ring.

  “Let me get outside so I can hear ya,” he yells into the phone, and I almost want to cry with relief when I hear his deep voice.

  The background noise gets quieter, but I can still hear him calling out hellos to people. When you’re the head of a taskforce in a small town like he is, everyone knows you and wants to talk to you. Finally, it’s blessedly quiet and I hear his taut tone over the phone. “You okay, babe?”

  Babe is new since the afternoon in the garage, and I have to admit, it makes me grin every time I hear it. Which proves just how bad I’m starting to have it when it comes to my husband. “Hey, a deer ran out in front of me on Copper’s Creek Road,” I start.

  “Are you okay? Did you hit it?” I can hear the worry in his voice and can just imagine the look on his face.

  “I’m fine, and I didn’t hit it, but I blew a tire when I was swerving out of the way.”

  He curses in the voice that sends goosebumps down my arms. “Probably where they’re doing construction on the Foster Farm. We’ve been after them to clean the shit up those trucks throw behind them, but obviously they aren’t paying attention. Give me twenty to thirty minutes and I’ll be there.”

  Even though it gives me a warm fuzzy that he’s willing to cut his night out with the guys short, I feel guilty. “You don’t have to come. If you could call me a wrecker, I’d be grateful. I didn’t know what to do, or who to call. I don’t know how to change a tire,” I admit.

  “I’m not leaving you on the side of the road while I hang out with my boys. Trust me, it’s not that big a deal. I won’t be able to change your tire tonight, but we can lock everything up, I’ll drive you home, and we can head back out tomorrow for your car.”

  I bite my lip, second guessing my decision now, because I’m never sure where I stand with him, where we stand together. “I didn’t know who else to call.”

  “No, you did the right thing calling me. Me. You always call me. No matter what it is. You have a good day, a bad day, blow a tire, need a hug, need to get laid. You need someone, for anything? You call me; I’ll take care of it. You feel me?”

  Frustration eats at me, and even though my heart dances a jig at what he’s saying, I still hate bothering him. “I feel like you’re always taking care of my messes and cleaning up after my mistakes.”

  He sighs heavily into the phone. “I don’t do this for everybody, Leigh. In fact, I don’t do it for anybody else.”

  “Why?” I have to know why he’s picked me to be his charity case. “You don’t know any other damsels in distress?”

  For a few moments, I think he’s not going to answer. “The truth?”

  “Always the truth, Holden. You’re the one person in my life who doesn’t lie to me. I wanna keep it that way.”

  His voice drops an octave, and it causes a reaction in me I’m not prepared for. Since the afternoon in the garage, everything he does not only turns me on, but makes my heart flutter faster. “There’s nobody else I care about like I care about you.”

  I’m speechless. Holden is a man of few words, but holy shit when he says them, he makes them count. It gives me a feeling in my stomach that I can’t name. No one, not even the social workers who were called on my dad, gave a sh
it about me. They looked at him, took the money he handed off in their direction, and left a young girl in a house full of men who didn’t know what to do with her. None of them knew what to tell me when I started my period. When I had questions about how to do my makeup, my hair, or what was the appropriate way to act on a date, there were no answers. There wasn’t even any trying to understand what I was going through. Looking back now, I realize they didn’t give a shit. Instead, I had to ask other women, not related to me, how to use tampons, to help me make an appointment at an OBGYN’s office to get birth control. My whole life, I begged for help and it was never given to me.

  But this man, this thoughtful amazing man, took me in, and he’s teaching me that I can count on someone besides myself. I can open myself up to another person and not always be fucking disappointed.

  “Thank you for caring, Holden.”

  He clears his throat, maybe uncomfortable with what he’s shared. “Get in your car and lock it until I get there. I don’t think anybody will be traveling that stretch of road this late at night, but if they are – they’re up to no good.”

  “Got it. Thank you,” I whisper.

  “Be there as soon as I can.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  Leighton

  I never realized how dark it is at night, especially out in the country, until I’m stuck in it. At my childhood home, I never went outside at night by myself. I wasn’t one of those kids who liked to catch lightening bugs. The dark has always scared me. Usually when I’m at home with Holden, we’re inside or we’re outside together. I have to admit I’m spooked to be waiting on him. I can hear all the sounds of the wilderness and my imagination starts running wild. Nobody escaped from jail recently, did they? Or maybe there’s some weird serial killer in the woods looking for their next victim.

  “You’re prime pickin’ for them if they are, Leighton,” I whisper as I turn the car back on, turn up the radio, and hope to drown out the sound of my own thoughts. Hoping like hell Sam Hunt can lure me into a sense of safety, I sing along to every song I know.